I watched Biggest Loser last night. Before it came on I decide that I was going to pick a contestant that I felt was most similar to me in personality and struggles with weight issues. So going into the show, that was my goal. I watched and watched, waiting on one of the ladies to really speak to me. Well by the end of the show, I realized which one I most identified with the one that I most did not want to identify with. It was Joelle. The whining, weak one that doesn't give 100% and can't do more. That was crushing.
This morning I got an email from Julian's website I signed up for. This was the thought of the day:
Last night, Bob completely flipped out on Joelle because she wasn't giving 100 percent in her workouts. She kept on saying she was doing her best, that she couldn't try any harder, but he wouldn't take that for an answer. Well, guess what — in the end, she did what he was asking her to do. And she didn't die. The only thing holding her back had been her belief that she couldn't do it. Think about the roadblocks you're creating for yourself when you keep saying, "I can't." What would you accomplish if you started saying "I can"?
How very very true. We do hold ourselves back from doing things that are scary, new or different. I know I do this. I don't know how to stop though. My mind says that I have so many things that I have to do, fears I have to face, changes I have to make, why add worrying about weight to it. Is it going to take me actually having a life threatening health condition to get over myself?
One last thing, Randy Pausch said "Brick walls are there for a reason. They let us prove how badly we want something." I have this quote taped up on my desk and I look at it every day. Every day I read it and know that my weight is my brick wall. Every day I know that only I can do anything about it. Every day I look at that wall. Every day I ask myself how badly do I want it. Every day I poke at it, I prod around it, I try to figure out a fast and easy way over it. In the end, every day, I know I have to take matters into hand and knock the fucker down. There is no easy way and it's time for me to stop looking for one.
Next week I will watch Biggest Loser again and try to identify myself with one of the ladies on there. Next Wednesday I hope to be able to say that I identified with someone other than Joelle. I hope to be able to say that I turned "I can't" into "I can". I hope to be able to honestly say that I gave 100% and know that I actually did. I hope that my friends that have been struggling to get back on the wagon along with me will join in and do the same thing.
This morning I got an email from Julian's website I signed up for. This was the thought of the day:
Last night, Bob completely flipped out on Joelle because she wasn't giving 100 percent in her workouts. She kept on saying she was doing her best, that she couldn't try any harder, but he wouldn't take that for an answer. Well, guess what — in the end, she did what he was asking her to do. And she didn't die. The only thing holding her back had been her belief that she couldn't do it. Think about the roadblocks you're creating for yourself when you keep saying, "I can't." What would you accomplish if you started saying "I can"?
How very very true. We do hold ourselves back from doing things that are scary, new or different. I know I do this. I don't know how to stop though. My mind says that I have so many things that I have to do, fears I have to face, changes I have to make, why add worrying about weight to it. Is it going to take me actually having a life threatening health condition to get over myself?
One last thing, Randy Pausch said "Brick walls are there for a reason. They let us prove how badly we want something." I have this quote taped up on my desk and I look at it every day. Every day I read it and know that my weight is my brick wall. Every day I know that only I can do anything about it. Every day I look at that wall. Every day I ask myself how badly do I want it. Every day I poke at it, I prod around it, I try to figure out a fast and easy way over it. In the end, every day, I know I have to take matters into hand and knock the fucker down. There is no easy way and it's time for me to stop looking for one.
Next week I will watch Biggest Loser again and try to identify myself with one of the ladies on there. Next Wednesday I hope to be able to say that I identified with someone other than Joelle. I hope to be able to say that I turned "I can't" into "I can". I hope to be able to honestly say that I gave 100% and know that I actually did. I hope that my friends that have been struggling to get back on the wagon along with me will join in and do the same thing.
